Protecting Your Self-Esteem from Social Media
I would like to talk about something I’m sure we have all dealt with in our worlds of social media- comparing yourself to others and letting it affect your self-esteem and sometimes your entire day. How many times have I scrolled and scrolled on the explore page and found myself an hour later lost on a stranger’s page that I’m all of sudden comparing my own life to? Lots of times. Never have I felt wonderful about myself after getting lost down a rabbit hole of Instagram models and people on glamorous vacations. Its only left me feeling inadequate, broke--because I can’t afford to go to Fiji, and self conscious about my lifestyle. Not fun right? So why do we keep doing it? The only conclusion I’ve come to is that we are looking to be stimulated, inspired, and jealous of other people. Well, okay, maybe not the latter, but it’s somewhat true. So how do we guard ourselves from feeling these anxious, envious vibes through the gliding of our innocent fingers leading us to the next beautifully filtered picture?
Here a few pointers that I’ve come up with personally to help:
1.) Upon opening Instagram, give yourself a time limit to search and scroll. Set an alarm if you have to, this way you don’t look at the clock an hour later and begin to feel guilty with as much time you spent. Try this app, it tracks how much screen time you use each day on your phone and on Apps: https://itunes.apple.com/us/app/moment-screen-time- tracker/id771541926?mt=8
2.) Remind yourself that every picture you see whether of a ‘model’ or a beach, that you can take that same picture and make it look just as good. It’s called ‘Facetune’ and you can give a house a nose job or a smooth stomach with it if you wanted. Everyone uses it to make themselves look better so keep that in mind. Did I mention EVERYONE? I’ve been insecure about my crooked nose for years and I’ve 100% used Facetune to tweak it and make myself feel better about it. We all do it, but I want us to get better at embracing flaws and viewing the imperfections as little additives that set us apart. Let’s work on this Together!
3.) This one is important: please, please, please remember that your self-worth and amazingness is not calculated by the number of people that like your photo. I know sometimes that is easier said than done because honestly I get anxiety posting a picture with the expectancy of how people will react to it. WHY IS THIS?! It sounds so silly when said out loud, but c’mon let’s face it, we’ve all been there. You post a picture and then wonder if anyone at all will think its decent and worthy of a like. It affects even the most confident, intelligent people. Remember that just because half of your followers didn’t like your Taco Tuesday photo---YOU liked it and found it worthy to add to your Beautiful Instagram page. Remember that you are telling YOUR story and don’t need someone else to validate how cool Taco Tuesday was, you know how epic it was and that’s what matters. If all else fails, message me and I’ll like your pic and comment 20 times. ☺
4.) If and when you do find yourself down a rabbit hole of despair, gain control over your life and throw the phone. I’m serious. You don’t have time for that sh*t. Take some deep breaths, get some fresh air and come back to reality. Remind yourself that your life is awesome and you have real-life people that actually love and care about you. If you were stranded on side of the road, is creepy PhilyouAlot336 going to come to your rescue and save you? Noooooo. So who cares about his likes. Your mom will probably be there though or someone else that truly cares for you – or there is always TripleAAA. And you can always take a selfie with your Mom or the TripleAAA guy, I’ll make sure to like and comment on that photo.
To sum it up, we all face feelings of inadequacy or moments of self fraud. You begin to feel like you are faking it to everyone and not even sure what the hell you are feeling most of the time. It’s OKAY! You are not a fraud; you are just trying to figure out where you belong in this social media freak world. And c’mon, we’re all faking it until we’re making it to some degree. At least we all have that in common. We all just want to be liked and accepted, so lets please all spread more of accepting each other! And most importantly accept your Beautiful self!!
And Cheers to you Facetune! For making my nose look less crooked and deviated! ;-)
Thank you so much for reading and please remember you are worthy of everything good, so Love yourself more. #nofilterneeded
Love, Dear L.j.*